How Not to Quit
Even if you HATE your job and think your boss is a total a$$hole, quitting is really hard. It can be super difficult to resign tactfully with grace. Although you’ve probably had fantasies about telling off your smug staffer it’s not quite as simple as announcing that you’re “Audi 5000”, flipping everyone off and hopping a flight to the Bahamas. Yes, you could do that… but it will probably not benefit your career in the long run.
Other bad quitting ideas include:
1. Texting everyone when you are liquored up that you won’t be coming back to the office – EVER.
2. Going dark before a big pitch or presentation and then bidding the team an Irish Goodbye.
3. Writing a deep, philosophical meaning of life email and sending it to the entire firm. This used to be quite popular (and seriously amusing) but still not a great long-term strategy unless you plan on moving to Nepal and herding goats. Emails get passed around. Here is one of the most famous resignation emails for your amusement.
4. Surprising your employer that you are quitting by filing a lawsuit against the firm.
5. Starting to tell people that you have another offer and allow rumors to circulate before you tell your group head.
6. Announcing your plans before you’re 100% certain and have a signed, accepted offer in hand or you know exactly what you’re going to next.
Be a Quitting Winner
Here are a few simple tips to help you resign effectively, salvage relationships (and recommendations) and not burn bridges with your existing firm.
- Keep it on the DL. Make sure no one else knows you are looking for a new job. Seriously, it’s a hard NO. Telling everyone you are in the market for a new gig, posting “open for opportunities” on Linkedin. Um, sharing is not caring, nope and nope.
- Avoid burning bridges because you might need recommendations in the future. Hard but true. The pain is almost over try your best to hold it together and don’t get emotional.
- Line up another offer or HAVE A PLAN for what you’ll do after you quit. I understand that you are exhausted. I understand that you are burned out. I understand that you are miserable. BUT…I repeat, do not quit before you have plan.
- Plan for quick departure. In a normal job, once you give notice your boss might ask you to stay on for a couple of weeks to help with the transition. He/she may even bid you back by offering you a promotion or a bump in salary to stay. Unfortunately, that is often NOT the case in IB. Once you announce your intention to leave, plan for an immediate exit. There will be no sad, long drawn out goodbyes. Once you resign, IT will mostly turn off your computer immediately and you will be asked to leave the building. The practical reason for this is you have access to a lot of confidential information about public companies. If you continued to have access to that information, you could spread it around to other people or competitors. Bring home anything important – both physical possessions and computer files – in advance of quitting. You won’t have time to do this after you drop the bomb.
- Make a Clean Break. Tell your Managing Director first. Go directly to your MD, in-person, and explain the situation:
“I’ve greatly enjoyed my time here, but I have accepted an offer at [Name of New Job], and they want me to start immediately.” Your MD may or may not act professionally. You can’t control their actions but you can control your own. Stay cool and don’t get flustered. Once you’ve told your MD, let your other team members know that you have decided to leave the firm, keep it brief and unemotional.
- Craft a short farewell email with your new contact information that you can send out from your personal email account. Just send it to your own group, or to anyone you’ve worked with in the past. DO NOT SEND IT TO THE ENTIRE FIRM. Most people won’t care – trust me.
- Remember, you are expendable. Goldman Sachs will go without you. You are a very small cog in a very large wheel. A lot of junior bankers overestimate their own importance. Try to understand the pecking order. You are not the first person to resign and you won’t be the last.
Remember quitting is like ripping off a bandaid – stay calm, make it quick and the stinging pain will subside soon enough.
